Letter to Lily - 60 months (5!)

Dear Lily

On the 14th of March you turned five.

FIVE!

Morning of 5th birthday

I can't quite believe how big you are.

I also can't believe that I haven't written you a letter for 2 and a half years. I couldn't possibly hope to capture everything that has happened in that time. You have grown up so much.

Let me try to capture some of the detail.

Toadstool cake

When you were around 2 & 3/4 I introduced you to the Magic Faraway Tree books and you have been hooked every since. You know them back-the-front and can recite large swaths of it from memory. We even celebrated your 4th birthday with an Enchanted Wood party. You dressed up as Silky.

'Riding' to preschool - day 3

Just before your third birthday you started preschool at Blue Gum Community School in Canberra. You really thrived. It was an excellent place - inspired by Reggio and Nature Education philosophies - and you really loved it. While you were there you learned to swing yourself on the swing (after spending the first few months monopolising one of the teachers to continuously push you). You discovered a deep love of art and learned some amazing techniques like felting and mosaic and clay sculpture. You also made some gorgeous friends.

Snuggles with Charlie

When you were 3 & 1/2 your little brother Charlie arrived into our lives. You adored him from the start, but I have to admit that the transition from being our only child to being one of two was far from an easy one. We clashed a lot and I handled many parts of this transition particularly badly. We are really only just finding our feet again on this front.

Singing at the farmers market, Collingwood Children's Farm

When you were 4 & 1/2 we moved to Melbourne. It was a huge thing for us to do and again the transition was pretty unsettling for you, but I think we have all dealt with it a lot better this time. You were very reluctant to leave Canberra, but really gave Melbourne a chance and found that you really enjoyed exploring a new city. You particularly love the Collingwood Children's Farm, the new cafes and restaurants, the trains and trams, and our new neighbourhood. You also started a new preschool 3/4 of the way into the school year and still managed to enjoy it and socialise. I think that is pretty impressive.

First day of school

Walking home from the train

Then in February this year you started primary school. Again you have really thrived, despite being almost the youngest in the class. You truly love school and the rhythm and predictability of the Steiner curriculum really suits you. You have even brought many aspects of it home. We now say a 'blessing' before our meal, have a 'nature table' in our loungeroom, and you have firmly requested that I sing to you when I want your attention (which feels odd, but actually works).

with Tinky (the guinea pig)

For your birthday this year we welcomed Tinky and Winky (the guinea pigs) into our home. They (and their paraphernalia) were your main birthday present from family and it has been lots of fun watching them grow and settle in to our house.

Jungle Cake

We kept your birthday party small this year, but went all out with decorations. It was quite fun changing the dining room into a jungle, and I also enjoyed making your wacky cake. You dressed up as a tiger (with mama-made ears & tail and plain black clothing for the rest), Charlie was a monkey (though arguably the costume was superfluous). It was lovely to see you having so much fun with your new school friends. 

As part of your birthday celebrations at school they went around the class and everyone said something that they like about you. Your teacher, Alison, told us that many children commented that you were a good friend. This rings true to me Lily and makes me very proud of the person you have grown up to be.

Along with being a good friend, you are also great company, generous, witty, articulate, curious, compassionate, loud, analytical, sensitive, highly energetic, kooky, artistic and possess an incredible memory. Oh, and I love you so very very much.

love mama

xox

30 months

Dear Lily

Yesterday you turned 2 and a half. That's exactly half way to 5. Oh my.

This past month has been a good month (except for a little period of sickness, that we'll just ignore, OK?). As the weather has become warmer we have been able to get and about more, which has been good for our general happiness and sanity.

My favourite thing about this past month has been your tendency to speak as though you are living in a story book. You often add, "said Lily" to the end of your sentences and frequently try to put words into our mouths by using the same method. As in: "Can we go outside? Yes, said Mum."

In line with this new habit you have also been very keen on hearing stories about yourself. Or, at least, fictional stories in which you happen to be the main character.

"Tell me a Lily story" you will ask me at least once a day. Often you are even more specific; "I want the grandma and grandpa one." Or, "tell me a Lilipilli story." (My mother calls you Lillipilli). Or, "I want the party one."

It certainly keeps me on my toes. I can't believe how fascinated you seem to be by my incredibly boring stories. All I seem to do is describe the minutia of a day. They generally start with "Once upon a time there was a girl called Lily. She lived in a house on a hill with her mama and papa. One day Lily... went to visit her grandparents/flew up to Darwin/decided to have a party/went on a picnic etc..." Then I proceed to describe the details of travel or food preparation (it's always about the food in the end for me), arriving at a new place, packing up again and going home to bed. Really, someone should give me a book contract for this stuff.

Other than your love of living through stories, this month has also been marked by us having a lot less time together. Seven mornings a week you are whisked away by Papa or Kelli while I do my PhD. You come back home after lunch for your nap and then we only get a few hours together before dinner.

It's weird spending so much less time with you. I miss our excursions (mornings are really the best time for excursions). I think that you are also finding the adjustment a little challenging at times too. Although you seem to be going pretty well - you certainly go off each morning very happily - it has made you a little more clingy and a little more mama-focused recently. Hopefully that will start to settle down as you become used to the new routine.

Finally, as the weather has improved, the sun has been rising in the sky earlier and earlier lately. You are not a morning person. Not at all. But the bright sunlight has been waking you up very early lately. At first you try to go back to sleep. "It's too bright," you will complain to me, and roll over. But you eventually give up and so we all get up. Early. Oh so early. This has been a little challenging for all of us and is leaving our tempers a little bit frayed by the end of the day...

Fortunately daylight savings is around the corner and it should make things a little easier again. In the meantime, we will just have to focus on our enjoyment of the outdoors and the beauty of the sunrises.

love
mama
xo

29 months

Dear Lily

Today you turned 29 months old. Next month you will be 2 and a half. Don't ask me why, but that seems significant to me.

OK, the big news first. Drumroll... You are no longer using nappies during the day! Now I was kind of keen to do this whole transition when it got a big warmer, but no, you decided that nappies were totally not what you were into anymore and that was that. Yay you.

The second big change in your life that started last month is that you are no longer having mama milk at night. This change was more about me than you, I'm afraid. But you have been pretty cool about it. Previously when you couldn't get back to sleep without milk you would ask me to sing to you. I have absolutely no idea how many times I have sung 'Hush Little Baby' and 'Sing a Rainbow', but let's just say 'LOTS'. Anyway, now you are all about stories. So, in the middle of the night, while I am half asleep, I am making up random stories about a big girl called Lily who lives in houses, castles, and towers in the forest, by the seaside, and on the top of a hill. Generally these stories involve packing elaborate picnics, preparing party food or spotting various animals on morning walks. They are pretty boring, but that seems to be the trick.

The third big change is really not so big: you had your first haircut. Well, sort of. I often cut your fringe to keep it out of your eyes, but we had never cut the back of your hair before. The other day though, Papa said to me, "It might be time to give Lily's hair a bit of a cut." "Mmm," I said, absentmindedly. And then I went back to the study to do some more work. (You see, I had no intention of having your hair cut, but I didn't think that we were really 'talking' about the idea...) Anyway, imagine my surprise when I wandered back out for a cup of tea and saw Papa in the middle of actually cutting your hair! I was a little sad to be honest, but, of course, he did a really good job, and it looks great. Plus, hair grows.

Another cool change is that you seem to have regained your sense of fearlessness (within reason). You are loving swings at the moment and keep asking us to push you higher and higher and higher. It wasn't all that long ago that you were refusing to get on them at all and so this has been a wonderful change.

You are also continuing to eat really well, which I love. The other evening, after a late mothers' group, we were going to head home when you said, "Let's go to a restaurant and eat broccoli, tofu and noodles." Since Papa was going to have to stay at work late, I happily agreed. It was so cool, Lil. You happily sat up at the table and ate a big dinner, while I got to eat mine too. Previously dinners at restaurants have involved lots of walks outside for either Papa or I (with you), and we had to eat in shifts. But this time you stayed at the table and we ate our dinner together and chatted away happily. It did help that we were at a restaurant full of staff who actually like children and made an effort to make you happy. The lovely waiter took your order directly, then asked you what you wanted to drink and offered you a straw. He even drew you a smiley face and admired your drawing in return. You thought that he was "lovely". It was such a pleasant evening and I am looking forward to many more dinner dates with you in our future.

It's still amazes me just how much you grow and change every single month. It is such a privilege to be able to share it all with you.

with all my love,
mama
xox

28 months

Dear Lily

On Tuesday you turned 28 months old.


This hasn't been the best of months really. I have been sick for most of it and Papa hasn't been well this last week either. To your credit, however, you have been extremely tolerant of our generally listless ways and have displayed a considerable knack for entertaining yourself.



Another development this month has been the dramatic increase in your appetite. You have never been a big eater. You have always preferred to graze rather than eating large meals. While this hasn't changed, the amount of food that you are eating over the course of a day took a dramatic turn upwards a few weeks ago and has been consistent ever since. I took this as my cue to cut back on the breastfeeding quite a lot and I have been really happy with the result. It is nice being able to take you out during the day and not being hassled to stop and feed you in random places all the time. I was getting tired of this and it has all but stopped now, which is great.



Your interest in food has also extended to the preparations, which has been fun. You are really getting into helping us cook and spend a considerable amount of time 'cooking' in your own kitchen as well. Playdough pizza has been quite a popular recipe.

What else?

You are finally drinking out of a cup without tipping the contents everywhere. Yay!

You are quite into re-enacting at the moment. A particular favourite for you is for us to re-enact scenes from Playschool.

"You be Simon and I'll be Karen," you say. "Oh, something's missing... It needs a tail." You will then attached some string or tissue paper the end of your 'model'. "Ah, that's better; a swishy tail." Then you will look at me, "That's right; it's a dog."

You have a peculiar habit of randomly turning to Papa or I and saying "Nice to meet you." I am not sure why, but it is quite cute.

Everything at the moment is "regular". For example, you wanted Papa's birthday cake to be a 'regular cake' (instead of the chocolate chimpanzee that you had initially thought of).

You are currently loving red capsicum, sushi, ice cream, miso soup, kelp salad, chocolate, eggs, broccoli, pasta, and vegemite toast. And last night you ate (and enjoyed) carrot for the first time ever.




Tomorrow morning we are off to Sydney for to spend a few days with your Grandparents. What with them, the animals, the activities and all the rest, you are pretty much guaranteed to have fun.

love
mama
xox

27 months

Dear Lily

Yesterday you turned 27 months old.

Last month was a pretty big month for us. First up, you and I flew up to Darwin to visit Grandma M. and G2. I must admit that I was worried about flying so far alone with you (on three different planes), but you were such a fantastic traveler. You rode happily on my back at each of the airports, chatted away to anyone waiting in line with us, played with stickers on the plane, listened to stories, ate chips (my secret weapon), and then slept on my lap.





Once in Darwin you had a ball. We went to heaps of different markets, where you romped about eating spring rolls, drinking fruit shakes, and generally getting dirty. We swam in the warm ocean and in Grandma M. and G2's pool, and you bathed in a bucket. We fed fish (well, you ate most of the bread that you were supposed to feed them, but they did get a little bit). We went to the local library and read books. And we played at many many playgrounds in the lovely warm sunshine. It was a really lovely holiday. (We also went camping in Kakadu - something that you are still talking about constantly - but I have already written lots about that here).





Back home things have been pretty busy too. You are still enjoying your dance classes. You love to dress up in different outfits each week and to wear your new ballet shoes. You love doing the chicken dance and the 'free dancing'. You also love the musical instruments and the singing. And you particularly love the drama. Last week you pretended to visit Italy and you all made pizza. You came running over to me to give me a piece. The week before you pretended to visit Egypt. While the others were climbing a pyramid you decided to 'explore the tunnels'.






You are also still enjoying going to playgroup on Tuesdays. K. is away at the moment and so my cousin E. has started taking you along instead (along with her daughter M.). We were all a little worried that you would be upset by the change of arrangements, but you were totally fine. You ran all the way to her car, jumped in and said "Bye bye Mama. See you soon." And that was it. You are getting so big.

Midnight went home on Saturday, which was a bit sad. Yesterday morning you got quite upset when you realised that he wasn't with us anymore. So we encouraged you to look on the bright side. Now you can put your teddies on the floor and eat your food at your little table whenever you want. It wasn't much of a consolation, but you did go and get a few teddies to put on the floor. Then you covered them with blankets and asked us to call the doctor. Apparently they were sick.


I am really enjoying your imagination at the moment. You tell us the most amazing stories - often immediately upon waking - and they always have the quirkiest little details that make me laugh. It's so fun to watch your imaginative world grow and to hear all about it. I hope that you will always be so full of stories and creativity.

lots of love,
mama
xox

26 months

[OK, so please just pretend that this was posted on 14 May, because it is now so late that it is too embarrassing to admit how late it is, and most of it was sitting in a draft for the past 3 weeks or so...]

Dear Lily

Today you turned 26 months old. Tomorrow you and I are flying up to Darwin to visit Grandma M and G2. While we are up there we are going to go camping in Kakadu National Park. I think that it is going to be pretty fun.

This month has been all about nursery rhyme medleys, dancing, dress-ups, playdough and Midnight. Well, obviously we have done lots of other things too, but these things have really stood out this month for me.

First, the medleys. While you have been into your nursery rhymes for quite some time, recently you have started to create hilarious medleys of your favourites. You walk around the house (or elsewhere) singing these mashed-up versions - one rhyme slipping seamlessly into the next. I love it. I particularly love it when you also add in little snippets of your own text - lines about mama and papa, or whatever happens to be around you at the time.


Next, the dancing. Again, you have been into dancing for quite some time. You love nothing more than when we turn the music up loud, take you in our arms and dance wildly around the house. You will throw back your head and shake it from side to side grinning like the Cheshire Cat. However, recently we borrowed "Angelina's Ballet Class" from the library and suddenly you were ALL ABOUT ballet. Now every evening you will put on a tutu (sometimes around your waist, sometimes on your head, it doesn't seem to matter) and request that we put on "ballet music" (which, for now, consists of Vivaldi's Four Seasons) and then you will 'ballet' dance around the loungeroom for a good 45 minutes. Papa and I are often asked to join in and we have our own special costumes too.


Not long after taking up this new kind of dance, you asked me if you could do dance classes. It just happened to be the beginning of a new term that week and so we went along to a class to see what you thought. I think that it is probably a bit long (one hour) and a bit structured for you, but you insisted that you loved it and wanted to go back. You also asked me to get you some ballet shoes (despite the fact that your class isn't, actually, ballet...). So the other day we went to a dance shop and bought you some. I may have tried to talk you out of it if I had known how much they were in advance, but anyway... Now you have your own ballet shoes, you funny kid.


In addition to your dance costumes, you have also been dressing up a lot. Once again, this isn't exactly new, but you seem to be bringing a new level of understanding and imagination to it that has been so much fun to watch. You will very seriously contemplate the outfits that you select and then tell us all about them, before going off "to do some shopping", or "to work in [your] office", or "to go to the library", or "take big Ted to the doctor". I love watching you create your own stories and invent tricky ways of using your surroundings to make them work.


The playdough is fairly self-explanatory really. However, it has been a real focus this month - often pushing out drawing and painting for your attention. If you are upset or don't want me to do some work, etc... Papa can generally get you to happily move on if he suggests that you play with playdough. You love to make people and animals with it. Dinosaurs are a current favourite.


Finally, Midnight: Grandpa's dog has been staying with us for the last couple of weeks while he and Grandma are in Europe. You have been loving it (except for the times when you have to wait for my attention...), especially because it is getting us outside a lot more (despite the cold weather). You and he love to go across the road to the ridge and just run around, looking for sticks and collecting random bits of nature. It has been great to see you really letting your imagination run wild over there. The other day you took me over to a large fallen tree and explained that it was your house. You pointed out where all the rooms were and where you did the dishes and stored your food (mandarins, broccoli & tofu, apparently), then you proceeded to 'sweep' it clean with a fallen branch. It was great.



Once again, I have to say that I am loving the so-called terrible twos. You are so full of imagination and curiosity about the world and so capable of expressing yourself and your amazing perspective to us. You also seem to have moved on from those fears that were haunting you a little while ago and have gone back to being your fearless gutsy self, which has been lovely to watch.


I am so looking forward to what you come up with this month.

love
mama
xoxo

25 months

Dear Lily

You turned 25 months old 11 days ago. Is this the latest that I have ever been with your letter? Sorry darling.

This last month was your first month of being two and I have decided that two rocks! You are a delicious combination of grown up independence, articulateness, and imagination, rolled up with some very lovely innocence, fragility and wonder. I love it. The other day you were planning to fly in a rocket, through the clouds, to the sun. A four year-old informed you that you couldn't because the sun was too hot, but you remained undeterred and continued planning your travel companions, picnic food, etc. It was awesome.



Another characteristic that I am loving is your amazing amount of compassion. I bumped my head on a cupboard door the other day and you were so concerned about me. "Oh sore," you exclaimed gently touching my head. "Here I kiss it better. Mmm... You need a cuddle. That will make you feel better." And you proceeded to kiss my head while giving me lots of cuddles, muttering, "poor Mama. So sore."

I'm also loving your increasing capacity to grasp complex ideas and to communicate them to us. You love explaining how things work and then adding imaginative embellishments of your own. These little monologues are endlessly entertaining. You are quite the performer.



The other week you also described your dream to us - immediately after opening your eyes in the morning. It was incredibly detailed. Midnight (Grandpa's dog) was a crocodile, and he was jumping up out of a tree, and Grandpa was feeding him paper, and he was eating it: "Chomp, chomp." etc. It was quite a lot to take in first thing in the morning.

Finally, I am really enjoying your increased attention span. I have started trying to cook something with you every day. You seem to love it and you are getting better and better at chopping up vegetables, stirring, tipping and helping me measure things. Your increased attention span has also meant that we can do longer, more elaborate craft projects, which has been really fun!



love
mama
xo